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Difference between revisions of "Hand to Gland Combat"
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Also referred to as: | Also referred to as: | ||
| − | A date with Mrs. Palmer and her 5 slut daughters | + | * A date with Mrs. Palmer and her 5 slut daughters |
| − | Auditioning the hand puppet | + | * Auditioning the hand puppet |
| − | Badgering the witness | + | * Badgering the witness |
| − | Banging one out | + | * Banging one out |
| − | Bashing the Bishop | + | * Bashing the Bishop |
| − | Beating the * out of your best friend | + | * Beating the * out of your best friend |
| − | Beating the s*** out of your incapacitated midget | + | * Beating the s*** out of your incapacitated midget |
| − | Beating the snot outta Rotney | + | * Beating the snot outta Rotney |
| − | Beating the snotty end of my * stick | + | * Beating the snotty end of my * stick |
| − | Blueball baseball | + | * Blueball baseball |
| − | Burping the worm | + | * Burping the worm |
| − | Calling down for more Mayo | + | * Calling down for more Mayo |
| − | Calling in the National Guard to assist you in a strategic crisis | + | * Calling in the National Guard to assist you in a strategic crisis |
| − | Caping the crusader | + | * Caping the crusader |
| − | Cheating on your other hand | + | * Cheating on your other hand |
| − | Checking the plumbing | + | * Checking the plumbing |
| − | Choking the bald guy 'til he pukes | + | * Choking the bald guy 'til he pukes |
| − | Choking the sheriff and waiting for the posse to come | + | * Choking the sheriff and waiting for the posse to come |
| − | Cleaning my Gun | + | * Cleaning my Gun |
| − | Cleaning the pipes | + | * Cleaning the pipes |
| − | Cleaning the walls after an accident involving the Milk Man and the Cyclops | + | * Cleaning the walls after an accident involving the Milk Man and the Cyclops |
| − | Committing mass spermicide | + | * Committing mass spermicide |
| − | Decongesting the weasel | + | * Decongesting the weasel |
| − | Discharging the heat-seeking moisture missile | + | * Discharging the heat-seeking moisture missile |
| − | Doing ones washing by hand | + | * Doing ones washing by hand |
| − | Dripping white-hot coconuts from the veiny palm tree of lust | + | * Dripping white-hot coconuts from the veiny palm tree of lust |
| − | Dropping the kids off at the pool | + | * Dropping the kids off at the pool |
| − | Escorting the one-eyed postal worker out of his denim cell | + | * Escorting the one-eyed postal worker out of his denim cell |
| − | Evicting the testicular squatters | + | * Evicting the testicular squatters |
| − | Firing the presidential staff | + | * Firing the presidential staff |
| − | Fishing for zipper trout | + | * Fishing for zipper trout |
| − | Five-finger discount | + | * Five-finger discount |
| − | Flogging your dumber brother | + | * Flogging your dumber brother |
| − | Foreplay with Fistina | + | * Foreplay with Fistina |
| − | Four-knuckle shuffle (for those who lost a finger in 'Nam) | + | * Four-knuckle shuffle (for those who lost a finger in 'Nam) |
| − | Freeing the hostages | + | * Freeing the hostages |
| − | Freeing Willy | + | * Freeing Willy |
| − | Getting your palm red | + | * Getting your palm red |
| − | Givin' the one-eyed field mouse with the purple turtle-neck sweater a hot-butter nuggie | + | * Givin' the one-eyed field mouse with the purple turtle-neck sweater a hot-butter nuggie |
| − | Giving the pink Mustang a spit shine | + | * Giving the pink Mustang a spit shine |
| − | Giving the seamen shore leave | + | * Giving the seamen shore leave |
| − | Giving yourself a helping hand | + | * Giving yourself a helping hand |
| − | Giving yourself a low five | + | * Giving yourself a low five |
| − | Having a play date with your little friend | + | * Having a play date with your little friend |
| − | Having a puppet show in your pants | + | * Having a puppet show in your pants |
| − | Having a staff meeting | + | * Having a staff meeting |
| − | Hitchhiking under the Big Top | + | * Hitchhiking under the Big Top |
| − | Launching the morning missile | + | * Launching the morning missile |
| − | Letting out the bulimic one-eyed monster | + | * Letting out the bulimic one-eyed monster |
| − | Making special sauce with frank and beans | + | * Making special sauce with frank and beans |
| − | Making the bald guy cry | + | * Making the bald guy cry |
| − | Making the Cyclops do chin-ups 'til he throws up | + | * Making the Cyclops do chin-ups 'til he throws up |
| − | Making the llama spit | + | * Making the llama spit |
| − | Manhandling your man-handle | + | * Manhandling your man-handle |
| − | Milking the blue veined yogurt chucker | + | * Milking the blue veined yogurt chucker |
| − | Milking the bull | + | * Milking the bull |
| − | Million sperm march | + | * Million sperm march |
| − | My sex life! (Okay, that one's more sad than funny) | + | * My sex life! (Okay, that one's more sad than funny) |
| − | One-handed workout | + | * One-handed workout |
| − | Opening up a bottle of Squirt | + | * Opening up a bottle of Squirt |
| − | Performing diagnostics on your ManTool | + | * Performing diagnostics on your ManTool |
| − | Playing pocket polo with Agent Johnson | + | * Playing pocket polo with Agent Johnson |
| − | Playing the stand-up organ | + | * Playing the stand-up organ |
| − | Playing with Yoosef | + | * Playing with Yoosef |
| − | Polishing my rocket | + | * Polishing my rocket |
| − | Polishing the family jewels | + | * Polishing the family jewels |
| − | Polishing the hot rod | + | * Polishing the hot rod |
| − | Polishing the purple people pleaser | + | * Polishing the purple people pleaser |
| − | Practicing for the Big Game | + | * Practicing for the Big Game |
| − | Pulling the single serving soup dispenser | + | * Pulling the single serving soup dispenser |
| − | Rapid one arm pull-ups | + | * Rapid one arm pull-ups |
| − | Releasing the Olympic Doves | + | * Releasing the Olympic Doves |
| − | Riding the Great White Knuckler | + | * Riding the Great White Knuckler |
| − | Romancing the bone | + | * Romancing the bone |
| − | Roughing the passer | + | * Roughing the passer |
| − | Roughing up the suspect | + | * Roughing up the suspect |
| − | Rubbing the Buddha for good luck | + | * Rubbing the Buddha for good luck |
| − | Running in single-user mode | + | * Running in single-user mode |
| − | Running off a batch by hand | + | * Running off a batch by hand |
| − | Sanding the obelisk | + | * Sanding the obelisk |
| − | Sending yourself a hand-job-o-gram | + | * Sending yourself a hand-job-o-gram |
| − | Shaking hands with your wife's best friend | + | * Shaking hands with your wife's best friend |
| − | Shaking the coconut milk of love from the leafless palm trunk | + | * Shaking the coconut milk of love from the leafless palm trunk |
| − | Shaking the hand of the self-employed | + | * Shaking the hand of the self-employed |
| − | Shooting tadpoles at the moon | + | * Shooting tadpoles at the moon |
| − | Shooting the pump action porridge gun | + | * Shooting the pump action porridge gun |
| − | Slapping the big-nosed Rasta man | + | * Slapping the big-nosed Rasta man |
| − | Spackling the ceiling | + | * Spackling the ceiling |
| − | Spending some quality time with yourself | + | * Spending some quality time with yourself |
| − | Spilling my children on my belly | + | * Spilling my children on my belly |
| − | Spit-polishing the purple helmet | + | * Spit-polishing the purple helmet |
| − | Squeezing the cream from the flesh Twinkie | + | * Squeezing the cream from the flesh Twinkie |
| − | Stroking the one-eyed burping gecko | + | * Stroking the one-eyed burping gecko |
| − | Swinging the purple-veined kidney stabber | + | * Swinging the purple-veined kidney stabber |
| − | Taking little Elvis to Graceland | + | * Taking little Elvis to Graceland |
| − | Taking the Jocelyn Elders Midterm | + | * Taking the Jocelyn Elders Midterm |
| − | Taking your turn at the self-serve pump | + | * Taking your turn at the self-serve pump |
| − | Target practice with the yogurt gun | + | * Target practice with the yogurt gun |
| − | Teasing the purple-headed custard chucker | + | * Teasing the purple-headed custard chucker |
| − | Tenderizing the tube steak | + | * Tenderizing the tube steak |
| − | Test-firing the meat missile | + | * Test-firing the meat missile |
| − | Testing the hand cream dispenser | + | * Testing the hand cream dispenser |
| − | Trolling for the one-eyed walleye | + | * Trolling for the one-eyed walleye |
| − | Tube sock tango | + | * Tube sock tango |
| − | Warming up the altar boy's dinner | + | * Warming up the altar boy's dinner |
| − | White-water wristing | + | * White-water wristing |
| − | Wrapping my hand around my c*** and blowing a load all over my mother | + | * Wrapping my hand around my c*** and blowing a load all over my mother |
| − | Zygote spraying | + | * Zygote spraying |
Revision as of 20:51, 19 May 2005
The beastly practice of masturbation.
Also referred to as:
- A date with Mrs. Palmer and her 5 slut daughters
- Auditioning the hand puppet
- Badgering the witness
- Banging one out
- Bashing the Bishop
- Beating the * out of your best friend
- Beating the s*** out of your incapacitated midget
- Beating the snot outta Rotney
- Beating the snotty end of my * stick
- Blueball baseball
- Burping the worm
- Calling down for more Mayo
- Calling in the National Guard to assist you in a strategic crisis
- Caping the crusader
- Cheating on your other hand
- Checking the plumbing
- Choking the bald guy 'til he pukes
- Choking the sheriff and waiting for the posse to come
- Cleaning my Gun
- Cleaning the pipes
- Cleaning the walls after an accident involving the Milk Man and the Cyclops
- Committing mass spermicide
- Decongesting the weasel
- Discharging the heat-seeking moisture missile
- Doing ones washing by hand
- Dripping white-hot coconuts from the veiny palm tree of lust
- Dropping the kids off at the pool
- Escorting the one-eyed postal worker out of his denim cell
- Evicting the testicular squatters
- Firing the presidential staff
- Fishing for zipper trout
- Five-finger discount
- Flogging your dumber brother
- Foreplay with Fistina
- Four-knuckle shuffle (for those who lost a finger in 'Nam)
- Freeing the hostages
- Freeing Willy
- Getting your palm red
- Givin' the one-eyed field mouse with the purple turtle-neck sweater a hot-butter nuggie
- Giving the pink Mustang a spit shine
- Giving the seamen shore leave
- Giving yourself a helping hand
- Giving yourself a low five
- Having a play date with your little friend
- Having a puppet show in your pants
- Having a staff meeting
- Hitchhiking under the Big Top
- Launching the morning missile
- Letting out the bulimic one-eyed monster
- Making special sauce with frank and beans
- Making the bald guy cry
- Making the Cyclops do chin-ups 'til he throws up
- Making the llama spit
- Manhandling your man-handle
- Milking the blue veined yogurt chucker
- Milking the bull
- Million sperm march
- My sex life! (Okay, that one's more sad than funny)
- One-handed workout
- Opening up a bottle of Squirt
- Performing diagnostics on your ManTool
- Playing pocket polo with Agent Johnson
- Playing the stand-up organ
- Playing with Yoosef
- Polishing my rocket
- Polishing the family jewels
- Polishing the hot rod
- Polishing the purple people pleaser
- Practicing for the Big Game
- Pulling the single serving soup dispenser
- Rapid one arm pull-ups
- Releasing the Olympic Doves
- Riding the Great White Knuckler
- Romancing the bone
- Roughing the passer
- Roughing up the suspect
- Rubbing the Buddha for good luck
- Running in single-user mode
- Running off a batch by hand
- Sanding the obelisk
- Sending yourself a hand-job-o-gram
- Shaking hands with your wife's best friend
- Shaking the coconut milk of love from the leafless palm trunk
- Shaking the hand of the self-employed
- Shooting tadpoles at the moon
- Shooting the pump action porridge gun
- Slapping the big-nosed Rasta man
- Spackling the ceiling
- Spending some quality time with yourself
- Spilling my children on my belly
- Spit-polishing the purple helmet
- Squeezing the cream from the flesh Twinkie
- Stroking the one-eyed burping gecko
- Swinging the purple-veined kidney stabber
- Taking little Elvis to Graceland
- Taking the Jocelyn Elders Midterm
- Taking your turn at the self-serve pump
- Target practice with the yogurt gun
- Teasing the purple-headed custard chucker
- Tenderizing the tube steak
- Test-firing the meat missile
- Testing the hand cream dispenser
- Trolling for the one-eyed walleye
- Tube sock tango
- Warming up the altar boy's dinner
- White-water wristing
- Wrapping my hand around my c*** and blowing a load all over my mother
- Zygote spraying
