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Pig Board

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A typical Pig Board requiring populating

Also known in some circles as a Gronk Board or Moose Board, there are three distinct kinds.


Unit Pig Board

The Unit Pig Board is one where the photos of all the soldiers sexual conquests are posted, for general amusement and ridicule. Usually found when the unit is deployed on Operations, but they can also be found at home in barracks. A good Unit Pig Board will have extra trimmings - such as liberated knickers, brassieres and stockings, and perhaps there will be the option for a voting system of some kind. Many Pig Boards, particularly Operational ones, may have a sub-section where hopeful future conquests may be displayed. Ex Girlfriends and Wives appear prominently on these boards, particularly if the split was acrimonious. The attachment of a Dear John letter to the Pig Board is mandatory in these circumstances.


Personal Pig Board

Personal Pig Boards are usually displayed within the room of the soldiers. It is a chronological record of the ladies that the soldier has entertained. It provides a focal point for boasting to his muckers about his ability as a swordsman. Luckily, many barracks these days provide an electronic pass for guests which has a small black and white photograph on. These credit card sized documents allow many entries to be placed on the Personal Pig Board before running out of room.


Corporate Pig Board

Found within the lobby of organisations, and also on their websites under some cheery banner such as "Meet The People", the Corporate Pig Board is a way that military and civilians alike can gauge their progress up the slippery slope of sexual shenanigans. Usually, these boards will be set out in a hierarchical style, allowing people to see just how well they are doing.

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A Corporate Pig Board, yesterday

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