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My enter key is buggered beyond repair - can't do paragraphs for a start - so it'd be nice if someone would wander along behind me, formatting where I can't. Appreciate it. ta


all of the current live categories are found here http://www.arrse.co.uk/wiki/Special:Categories. It takes a shit load of work to set up new cats and we have removed some of the years. Bookmark this page, it makes hunting cats easier and you can copy the cat address from there. --Rabid Hams 10:14, 5 June 2008 (BST)


hey dude ... while your enthusiasm for editing is great (we need all the help we can get), new pages are what we really need. The wanted page list is still pretty big and starting new pages from the list in the navigation bar fixes broken links as well as adding more content. Tweaks to pages we usually reserve when we are having a break from writing new stuff. take it easy (but get that CR key fixed! :o) --Rabid Hams 16:19, 5 June 2008 (BST)


Please check my wiki entry for reason of f'ed up spilling n bad grammer n that! :op :o) --Rabid Hams 23:57, 8 June 2008 (BST)


We hereby DEMAND you post an image of your sweaty self in your girlie IDF rig on your profile page. Feel free to use the black rectangle of secrecy, but WE... MUST... SEE! Buck Felize 15:46, 15 June 2008 (BST)


Jeez BF ... I was playing the long game hoping she would post a pic herself without us asking and looking like the pervs we are! .... although now that BF has asked.... Gonni? ;o) --Rabid Hams 17:43, 15 June 2008 (BST)


Welcome back. Thought you had gone on hols for 6 months. --Rabid Hams 19:45, 27 November 2008 (UTC)


Welcome back again. Thought you had gone on hols for good! --Rabid Hams 15:38, 8 April 2010 (UTC)


Spam filter

Sarah Palin was the Governor of Alaska - at least until the allegations of corruption and her desire to make millions as White Oprah took over - and in that capacity was the Republican Party's running mate for presidential hopeful John McCain in 2008. Another in the great line of good-looking running mates designed to attract the attention of shallow spam voters... mainly because the voter has the attention span of a goldfish.


You thought the choice of a shaved chimp reflected badly on the Grand Old Party? This proudly ignorant, God-addled, ego-drenched, and official third-best bit of totty to be found in 1984 Alaska, was the best option for POTUS Number Two they could come up with. This was considered the best candidate to step in when the terminally fucked-up mess of unresolved angst that was McCain passed on in the middle of complimenting his lovely wife.


While quite hot (a MILF and now a GILF courtesy of her under-aged daughter), Caribou Barbie is, quite frankly, barking. She believes in the creation rather than evolution, drilling in Alaska**, distribution of firearms to the under 5's, couldn't name one newspaper she reads on a regular basis (probably not one, ever), has zero idea what exists outside the US (some say outside of Alaska is a stretch) and has used her political position to pursue a vendetta against her former brother-in-law. Quality attributes in a US politician.


Palin's surprise inclusion on the ticket was initially hailed a success and gave McCain his only lead in the contest. She appealed to the ordinary 'Joe six pack' in the street (as well as the many evangelical mentalists) and it was thought she could attract supporters of the defeated Hilary Clinton away from the Democrats. Yes, ladies: the GOP seriously think you supported Hilary only because she's a woman, so they give you one and its a done deal. The presentation of her family at the Republican Convention had brought tears of joy and love to the eyes of the faithful; after that, the swing state gatherings had her showing off the flaccid lump of a future glazing-moistener that is the inevitable result of a pro-lifer getting up the stick in her 40's. Just as with the rest of her kids/brands, she named it by choosing at random a word from the Ikea catalogue.


However, very soon after Palin started opening her mouth, it was clear that the folksy image-management and down-home Hockey Mom spin could not help her when absurd reality took over. Mostly unable to string an intelligible sentence together unless parked in front of a teleprompter, Palin instead relied upon gurning and praying at rallies of the righteous. Despite frantic attempts at memorizing soundbites, and the softball approach of the interviewers, horrified campaign managers had to stop her from doing any more interviews after several well-publicised disasters. Her attempts at adlibbing answers to interviewers questions resulted in huge laughs on Saturday Night Live when a lookalike (Tina Fey) simply repeats the confused jumble of unrelated words. By the end of the campaign, the ban was on publically saying anything not pre-approved.


Once her own side had finally realized what a liability she was, she was mostly kept out of sight in the final run up to the election but the damage had been done. Post-election failure analysis has indicated she terrified 'independent' voters viz. the good folks of Shitsplatville, who voted in droves for Obama, despite his disturbing "uppity" tendencies and their unresolved and barely-concealed racism.


Palin would have stood a one in three chance of taking over as President (should McCain have won) simply through McCain dying of old age. For once the Spams showed some fecking sense and elected Obama... who may last an entire week before some good old boy plugs that uppity n*gger. Obviously no-one would be crass enough to run a dead pool on who assassinates Obama, when, where and how.


Shortly after the election, Palin quit as Governor of Alaska, to spend more time with her media career. The conservative/evangelical right had been looking to groom her as their presidential nominee for 2012 (evidently in the insane belief that she was a) a viable candidate and b) that all that went wrong in 2008 was that were not rightwing enough).


So, having now decided that Palin is, after all, too moderate and too modern for their tastes, the GOP chose as their exemplar of Republican womanhood a swivel-eyed witch from Minnesota called Michele Bachmann, who first rose to fame in 2005 when she insisted the USA government hold show trials for "unpatriotic" employees - that is, anyone who questioned GWB's policies. Bachmann's campaign for the nomination went nowhere but Palin's spiritual successor, Rick Mix, is still in with a shot at the title.


[**She certainly does, being the progenitor of multiple children!]