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Arts Council

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Fuck me! That’s original

Generic term used to describe the former Arts Council of Great Britain - a Non-Departmental Public Body dedicated to 'the promotion of the fine arts in Great Britain'.

For 'fine art' read shyte. Forget real art - Rembrandt, Goya and Turner, this bunch of self-congratulatory lefty cnuts are more interested in 'art' that better reflects the diversity and vibrancy of modern Britain, or some such gibberish.

These are the sort of twats (with names like Pippa and Tamsin) that pollute the airwaves on Newsnight Review - BBC2's flagship newsy programme and the visual equivalent of the Grauniad. They will bleat on interminably about utter garbage - generally all agreeing with each other and nodding meaningfully at each others' cerebralness. [Is that a real word? It is now.]

They will wax lyrical about a shopping trolley full of dogshit that's been 'created' by a controversial new 'artist' from Cleethorpes and enthuse over 'art' that looks like it's been either:

  • Knocked up by someone deliberately taking the piss
  • Been done by a three year old
  • Been done by a mong
  • Or Tracy Emin

The Arts Council of Great Britain was split in 1994 to form the Arts Council of England (now Arts Council England - getting rid of the 'of' was an act of total brilliance, and possibly a work of 'art' itself}, the Scottish Arts Council, and the Arts Council of Wales.

This gives the Porridge Wogs and Trogs a bit of autonomy over their bagpipe-playing lesbian mime theatre workshops... which is nice. Needless to say, these various councils are distribution bodies for the National Lottery, which means that it's all money for old rope and jobs for the boys - and ripe for abuse.