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Carling

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A weak, watery, fizzy, tasteless concoction, its sole virtue is its low price. The low price is because its creation was and is treated as an exercise in chemical engineering rather than the noble art of brewing. This approach also explains the other attributes.

Because of the low price and heavy marketing it is the best selling lager in the UK. It is a favourite of scabby chavs and can often be found in the bargain bin.

Only to be drunk if the alternative is floor polish or something home-made from nettles.