The British Military Open Encyclopedia - ARRSE-Pedia. Back to British Army Rumour Service Home

German Phase of War

From ARRSEpedia
Jump to: navigation, search

Preparation

Very important, this part. Massive amounts of beligerance and rhetoric are essential, murdering a substantial portion of your own population is optional. Have a good parade with some lovely songs too, everyone likes those.

Invade a Neighbour

This is the part where the right decision is essential, as the choices are threefold:

  1. Invade a neighbour with a negligible military capacity that no one likes, e.g. France
  2. Invade a neighbour who, although militarily weaker, has powerful friends, e.g. Poland, Holland
  3. Invade a neighbour against whom your military does not have a good track record, e.g. Blighty

Option 1 is easily performed, and is definately the favoured method, options 2 or 3 inevitably lead to the next stage...

Lose

This part is fairly easy, although frequently uncomfortable and expensive

Don't mention the war

I may have mentioned it once or twice when writing this, but I think I got away with it!