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Health and Safety at Work

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Actually quite an interesting subject.

More frequently used as a Bullshit Screen to prevent people from doing something. 'You can't do that, it's against Health and Safety!'. Anyone uttering these words should be tasked to show the Risk Assessment which says that this activity is so dangerous it should not be performed.

Contributions Wanted:  Please add your own H&S Advice below this line.
  • Remember, Dettol is not for splashing on your face - it's for drinking
  • Never wipe your arrse with broken glass
  • When having sex with a recent acquaintance take the following precautions: false name, fake phone number, cross fingers and hope for the best
  • Never sleep in an engine intake - with the blanks in
  • Never drink eyewash
  • Never shave your arse
  • Never rub Ralgex on your knob