God's Chosen people - the Scots.
Drunken wifebeating savages... mostly unemployed and stealing from the slot machines in every seaside town in England. Rant on about how great it is in Blantyre but make no attempt to go back home and stay there.
Pasty skinned alcoholics with bulbous noses and stories of sea captains... nearly all played for Rangers and Celtic schoolboys and all are related to Robert the Bruce and William Wallace and who apparently...
".....are colonized by w@nkers. Can't even find a decent culture to get colonized by. We're ruled by effete @ssholes."
- and Irvine Welsh should know, he's legged it for a cushy number in the States.
Note: If you're female.... a fearsome, handsome, hard-drinking, bloodthirsty manly race of men from the cold Northern climes...who look great in skirts.
Disappointingly for any women that fancy them, the majority will keel over and die around the age of 40 from a combination of stroke, coronary heart disease, cirrhosis of the liver and lung cancer induced by their diet of Jockanese food, Whisky, repulsive Scottish Beer and mammoth quantities of tabs which has, in any case, left most of them impotent from the age of twenty.
FECK! I'm in better shape than I thought I was for my age! Admittedly I dont touch anything deep fried or the piss beer and the shagging still seems to work ok.