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Kalashnikov

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The man himself:

Mikhail Timofeevich Kalashnikov

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It could be True

He came top of his class in Pottery and Needlework, designed a cheap nasty rifle with a distinctive sound, and also called Clint Eastwood and told him to include the line 'The preferred weapon of your enemy' in Heartbreak Ridge.

Lives on a strict diet of omelettes and vodka and is the founder member of the Minsk and District Working Men's Club, the first former Soviet working men's club to serve 'Websters' on draft'.

Why this dude is (in)famous

In 1944 Kalashnikov developed an experimental model of the self-loading carbine, and then later used the main internal units to form the basis a new submachine gun in 1946. This latter weapon gained an outstanding victory in difficult competitive tests. After development completion in 1949 the automatic weapon that is now synonymous with his name was adopted by the Soviet Army, and senior sergeant M.T. Kalashnikov was awarded by the Stalin Price First Class.

The Government highly estimated M. T. Kalashnikov's services to the country. He was twice honoured as Hero of Socialist Labour (1958 and 1976) and became Stalin Prize (1949) and Lenin Prize (1964) laureate. In 1969 he was given the rank of Colonel and in 1971 awarded the degree of Doctor of Engineering Science. M. T. Kalashnikov was decorated with three Orders of Lenin, Order of the Red Banner of Labour, Order of the Great Patriotic War of the First Class, Order of the Red Star and many, many, many medals.

Into the 21st Century

Today Kalashnikov is a brand name being tagged onto umbrellas, watches, aftershave, knives, lamps, energy drinks, vodka, snowboards and all the capitalistic tat that a Hero of Socialist Labour should stand against. What next? MiG widescreen TVs?!