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Rules of Engagement

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A set of rules given to junior officers by senior officers/politicians to be followed in case enemy forces are contacted.

These rules will invariably have been formed based on the political situation and will IN NO WAY give consideration to the poor F'in Tom on the ground. Remember that the author of these rules will inevitably be several thousand miles away from any unpleasantness.

You should remember that any UK Rules of Engagements (no matter how shoite) will be about 10 times better than UN rules (which simply involve begging for mercy).

Current Rules

Thanks to the weak wristed nu-labour government and Tony Fuckwit Blair, most likely the only weapon the British squaddie in a Peacekeeping Force will be allowed to use is harsh language (and then only if non racist, non sexist, non genderist and only a little bit threatening). This restriction will probably restrain the use of force right up till the point its too late (i.e. some raghead is kneeling on your chest trying to remove your ears with his kebab knife).

The Spam Rule of Engagement (in fact the only one they have) involves shouting FIRE! very loudly over the radio so every unit within 50 miles gets to unload full automatic in all directions.

Past Rules

40-odd years ago, in starched KD, we perused a green card which contained gems such as:-

  1. "If your post is approached by unidentified persons, you must call out in English and Arabic HALT! WAQQAF!
  2. If the person continues to approach your post, you are to repeat the warning in English and Arabic: HALT! WAQQAF!
  3. If the person continues to approach your post, you are to cock your weapon, call out in English and Arabic: HALT OR I WILL FIRE! WAQQAF WILLA OOTLIQ AN-NAAR!
  4. If the person continues to approach your post, you are permitted to fire only aimed shots, and only if you are convinced that your life and those of your fellow soldiers, might be in danger."

Imagine what we did with those green cards after a couple of months in Aden. 10 years in that shitehole cost us nearly 500 dead - about the same as the Aussies in Vietnam over a similar timespan. I remember 3 of my mates who didn't come back from there. And bugger me - Brit troops are back in the ME doing it all over again. Like the Yanks in 'Nam - we kicked the shite outta them militarily, but they beat us politically.