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Spaniel

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COCKER-SPANIEL.jpg
You're nicked me ol' cocker!

A small, affable, furry creature with a penchant for burying its nose in peoples' crotches - usually at the most inopportune moment.

Don't be fooled by their cute, fluffy appearance and bouncy nature, these creatures are devious, calculating and highly intelligent. If anything's going to drop you in the shit at an airport or ferry terminal, then pound to a penny one of these creations of the Almighty will be involved.

Apart from being used to sniff out drugs and explosives, it is a little-known fact that spaniels are an issue item, complete with their own NSN. Individuals scaled for this particular issue dog are invariably officers, who use this breed as a lead in (pun unintended) to the Labrador upon higher promotion.

Spaniels are available in a range of sizes and colours to suit most individuals:

  • King Charles Spaniel - Not ally. Drag one of these around the shoot and you'll be laughed at with much gusto.
  • Cavalier King Charles Spaniel - Cute. One for the missus.
  • Cocker Spaniel - These are devious, calculating, but lovable little buggers. Destroyers of duvets.
  • Springer Spaniel - Nutters, but de rigeur on the gun line.
  • Blue Roan - A Cocker Spaniel in urban camouflage. Often has more personality... and is smarter than the owner.
  • Orange Roan - Same as above but in desert DPF (Disruptive Pattern Fur).

See also Furry Crocodile and Land Shark.