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Terror Threat Level

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American levels of terror more terrifying

The Terror Threat Level is the mechanism by which the Labour Government can scare the living shoite out of every UK citizen whenever it feels like it.

A smart idea

Much like the BIKINI State, there are 5 levels of perceived threat from terrorists. The decision to raise the threat level is made independently by the UK's Joint Terrorism Analysis Centre (JTAC). This gives the UK citizen a prod to remind them, at times when terrorist chatter increases, there are bad men out there intent in removing our ears (and other extremities) with AK-47's, bombs or even kebab knives. The levels of threat are ...

  • Low - attack is unlikely
  • Moderate - attack is possible, but not likely
  • Substantial - attack is a strong possibility
  • Severe - attack is highly likely
  • Critical - attack is expected imminently

I assume at Critical we will all be expected to stay home while our armed forces (assuming there are any left in the UK) and the police patrol the streets looking to arrest or slot any suicide bombers (as long as they aren't muslim, since muslims cant ever ever ever be profiled as terrorists).

Then it all goes Pete Tong

The problem with this system is Labour simply cannot be trusted to operate it without turning it to political ends.

Firstly it has never been set below Substantial. At any time there is bound to be some nutter 'planning' the UK ill and that's probably been true since the Romans were intent on playing at being the 3rd Shock Army. Thus it is that we are living under substantial threat of being blown to Allah all the time. This becomes our default position and people being people, we get blasé ... so no bugger pays any attention to the level of threat.

Secondly Labour don't feel the need, citing secrecy, to tell us why the level goes up and down. There may indeed be increased terrorist chatter but when in Jan 2010 Home Secretary Alan Johnson simply upped the level to Severe without a word of explanation, you couldn't help but think he was trying to frighten people in the hope they would vote Labour OR indeed this was the start of Labour cancelling the elections because of a 'terrorist threat'. Story here.

Thirdly there are some people who actually think this threatometer has some validity and will start screaming for more totalitarian powers for the police and government: ie more detention without trial, more CCTV cameras, ID cards and indeed the forcible chipping, barcoding and branding of anyone the state feels like.

Not much kop then!

All in all this is a bleeding stupid idea that Labour brought in to look proactive but has already perverted the thing to levels of utter stupidity, ineffectualness, spin and is a total waste of money and breath ... like every Labour policy and indeed just like the Labour government itself.

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