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The Gorilla

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The Gorilla lives in the corner of every mess, NAAFI and pub.

You will never see The Gorilla but he can see you.

When you have had that one extra drink beyond a sensible level The Gorilla slips out of the bar and follows you home. Whilst you are asleep he sneaks into your bedroom, steals all your paper money, scatters loose change across the floor, ties the legs of your trousers in a knot, puts a bucket on your head and bangs it with a pickaxe handle then dangles his scrotum in your mouth (depending on the Gorilla's own particular style, he may well drop a log in your mouth too) before sneaking off to his next victim.

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