The World Cup
1. Everyone instantly becomes more patriotic ... except the Scots who support Anyone But England
2. People think its a good idea to festoon their cars with all sorts of flags and bunting ... which will end up in the bin
3. Land Command organise a major exercise
4. Everyone begins to believe that Beckham is a good player
5. Everyone becomes an instant expert in the game and decide to view their opinions
6. Old ladies start wearing football tops
7. Multiple German cars end up being destroyed when they put us out on penalties
8. Scots get abuse for not supporting England
9. Scots get to snigger when England gets put out
10. Recriminations start as to who's fault the ugly mess is ...
- 2006 scapegoats were Sven, WAGS and Rooney.
- 2008 scapegoat is Steve Mclaren who got it in the neck after failing to qualify for Euro 2008 and didn't even get to be the World Cup scapegoat.
- 2010 goats are shaping up to be Robert Green after he conceded a cockup of a goal to the USA in the first Engerland game AND the rest of the team for lackluster play.
World Cup 2010
2010 brought us a new annoyance.
The vuvuzela (Wikipedia Link): a road rage inducing plastic horn when blown sounds like a swarm of pissed off bees. Put 50,000 of the fecking things in a stadium and your patience (be you in the stadium or at home) will be totally fucked before your can of Wifebeater is even half empty.