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Trains

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006_Southall%20Train%20Crash%2040.jpg
Blocked toilet in Carriage 3

A mythical method of transportation that existed in the dim and distant past.

Once owned by the nation, British Rail (BR) spanned the country with a grid of 'railway track' upon which ran trains. These large moving kettles in the early days moving on to huge diesel or electric motors, pulled boxes on wheels containing goods and people. It was all very efficient but cost a bit of money.

Then some smart arrse government decided that it would be more efficient and competitive (and cheaper) if each area was partitioned into a local monopoly, then sold to a company that could fuck it up in the interests of making a profit. This company would have exclusive rights for a number of years and so could not just be 'removed' if found to be corrupt or incompetent. All the rolling stock (trains and engines and stuff) were leased from another company and a country wide monopoly was given the track to look after and rent out.

Complete chaos and disaster ensued with us paying more to these companies directly and indirectly than was ever paid to BR. Trains are poorly maintained, extremely overcrowded as the dying horse is poorly run and whipped to generate more cash . The network kills passengers every year through these profit demanding company's criminal negligence by the local monopolies i.e.

  • maintenance holidays where no work is done on the track to save money
  • substandard contractors used for maintenance done
  • experienced railway men replaced with yes men toadies

... yet nothing gets done to lock the feckers up for Corporate Manslaughter when it all goes Tits Up. Other nations have bullet trains and maglevs under construction and we have cattletrucks and 'leaves on the line' or the 'wrong sort of snow'.

Welcome to transportation in the 19th century.